Writing An Online Dating Service Profile? 3 Mistakes You Must Avoid...

Well, after 4 years of reading far in excess of 10,000 profiles of men and women searching for a partner through online dating services, I’ve laughed at my fair share of poorly written introductions...

Of those 10,000 online dating service profiles, no more than a dozen captured our attention enough to make the first move. I’m sure that you wish to get lots of reactions to your online dating service advertisement, otherwise why would you bother joining a site, and paying a fee to meet new people?

If that is the case, then make sure you avoid the following 3 mistakes at all costs:

1. "I May Be the one you’re Seeking For"
This may be the case. However, by employing this combination of words anywhere for your online dating service profile, you aren’t telling me, or your potential suitor, anything new...

What this line does say to someone checking you out is that the online dating service profiler didn’t do a lot of thinking about how they wanted to present themselves. Tell people what gets your eyes twinkling or even what REALLY gets you up in the morning - and don’t say it’s your alarm clock, either. Now is the time to let your passions really shine through...

2. "I’m the one Your Mother Warned You About"
This is, from my research in any case, virtually the most overused phrase in an opening line for online dating service profiles. True, it’s the generic option of some of the larger sites (such as Lavalife or even True) – if your profile is awaiting approval, this tag line will show up while waiting for the a-okay...

To avoid this, come up with something a bit more unique and original. But what if you aren’t sure how to do this? Well, it’s not hard to take a look at your competition in the online dating service field, so why not do a quick search and see what everyone else is doing?

Reading other people’s description of themselves could just get your creative juices flowing. At the very least, it’ll explain what everyone else is saying about themselves – and what key phrases and words you should avoid in turn...

3. Glaring Spelling or even Grammatical Mistakes
This tip might seem childish, or even trite – but its critically important. While chatting with someone online, you may make a few spelling mistakes that a potential suitor will find annoying. However until you get to that stage with someone, noone should know that you’ve got dyslexia, or just can’t spell worth beans...

It shows a lot to a potential suitor while they peruse the online dating services that someone has taken the time to spell check their document. Hell, get a friend to proof read it for you if want just in case you’ve missed something important...

However if you can't take the time to write something legible, virtually all people perusing the online dating service websites will assume you won’t have time to bother doing other, even more important tasks. And when you only have two or three of seconds to make that first impression before someone clicks on another person – each and every detail counts...

Your Online Dating profile – how to present yourself online

For many people, the hardest part of starting to date online is figuring out what to put in their profile. All dating sites offer their members a profile page, where each member can write about his or herself, upload a photo (or several) etc. What you write about yourself in the profile is extremely important: second only to the picture in terms of making other members aware of who you are and making them want to contact you.

Many people are keen to start searching for and contacting people as soon as they join a site. As a result, they either leave their profile blank, or write something quickly before beginning their search. This is OK if you’re just having a look around, but if you are serious about finding love online, you should take some time and make sure your profile is a good reflection of who you are. After all, it’s what makes you stand out from the rest of the people on the site.

Here are a few points to keep in mind:

Not too long, not too short

Try to write a profile that is detailed enough to tell people about you, but short enough to leave people wanting more. Writing a full length essay is a waste of time as most people wouldn’t bother reading it all. If someone did read it through and contacted you, you probably wouldn’t have anything left to talk about!

Be yourself

It’s easy to lie when writing a profile, but more difficult to follow through once you meet someone. If your profile says you’re 6’4” when you’re really 5’11”, your cover will be blown as soon as you turn up for your date. Also, starting a relationship with a lie is a sure way to get off to a bad start.

Unfortunately, even people who are honest and well-meaning sometimes lie unintentionally in their profile, by trying to write it in a way that they think would make them more attractive to other people. If you want to attract a likeminded person, you have to be honest about who you are, your hobbies and interests etc.

Don’t be too demanding

Many people use their profiles to list the qualities they would like their ideal match to have. There is nothing wrong with that, but make sure you balance this with information about yourself. You don’t want to come across as writing a ransom note.

Too much information

Avoid mentioning past disappointments and bad break-ups in your profile; this is not what the space is for. Think: do you really want this to be the first thing people see when they look you up? Don’t let yourself be defined by negative aspects of your personality and bad experiences of the past.


Make it funny

Using humour is a good way to liven up a profile and give people a glimpse into your personality. Some of the most successful profiles are the ones that simply make people laugh. Including a joke you find funny is good, as long as you make sure you write something about yourself in the profile as well.


Be original

Anyone can write “I have a good sense of humour”, but not anyone could make you laugh. When writing about yourself, don’t just use a list of adjectives. Try to go deeper and give people examples of what you actually mean. A good way of doing this is starting off with a list of adjectives and then using each one as a starting point for a few lines of text.

Upload a picture

Even the least shallow people want to know who they’re talking to. Not having a photo on your profile will make many people ignore you completely. Some people even specify in their search that they only want to speak to people whose picture appears on the site. Don’t worry about your looks. Different people have different tastes and not everyone expects to meet a movie star or a supermodel online. A clear headshot of you smiling is all it takes to seriously increase the amount of responses you get.


Be consistent

Make sure your profile, your screen name and your picture all match the impression you want to give. If you are a woman looking for a serious relationship, calling yourself “SexKitten” and uploading a semi-nude picture of yourself, is not likely to attract the kind of man you’re looking for. A man looking for a wife, should probably not use a username that hints about how good he is in bed.

Remember: your profile is the first (and often last) impression you will make to potential online matches. Make it count.